It took me a while to get out the door this morning - for a couple of reasons...First - I didn't realize how much stuff I needed to pack up with me in order to pump at work...it's a lot. Second - I don't know when the last time was that I had to get ready and be out the door by a certain time. Third - I just didn't want to leave. I thought to myself that if she's asleep - it will be easier to leave, but then as I was getting ready to leave, she woke up. So then I had to come back in to tell her bye, then she started smiling at me and that just broke it for me...how was I going to leave? But I did...and as I pulled into the parking lot at work - I wanted to turn the car around, go home and just call in sick. But I pushed on.
The feedings will hopefully go like this - I will nurse her at 3:00 am (which is for some reason when she wakes up...everytime no matter when we put her down) and at 6:00 am. Pump at 9:00, 12:00 and 3:00, be back home to nurse again at 6:00 pm and 9:00 pm until we start the rotation again. I am hoping in the next week or so, we can drop the 3:00 am feeding, but I am not complaining thus far. Getting 5.5-7 hours of sleep a night is better than I was getting when I was in my last few weeks of pregnancy!
I couldn't get out of work quick enough today...Ironically, we have some things going on at work and I have to go in early for the next 3 days and stay late...we'll have to adjust the above proposed schedule...but we'll see how it shakes down. I hate work - just the thought of being away from home...makes my heart sink into my stomach.
As we were giving Allie her bath tonight - I realized how big she has gotten...check out these comparison photos of bath time...this is why I hate to be at work during the day...it's going to make her growing up go by so much faster...
It really is hard, but you'll make it because you have to -- and it really does get easier. I have to be at work at 7am, so Sophia's still asleep when I leave. Then I come home from 4:30 - 5 (between my day job and teaching at USC at night), during which time Sophia's usually napping. Some nights I don't get home from teaching until 8:00 and her bedtime is between 8:30 and 9. So yeah, there are some nights that I don't get to see Sophia at all. But like I said, you'll make it and it does get easier. Fortunately, our nanny takes about 50 pictures a day, so when I get home, I can scroll through them and feel like I was there with her the whole time. Best of luck to you!!
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